Happy Friday, folks. It’s a crazy world out there.
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| Finally! |
1. Mystery Runner Won’t Stop Publicly Pooping Around Colorado Town (Competitor)
A mystery woman in Colorado Springs, Colo. is giving runners a pretty crappy reputation. According to local CBS affiliate KKTV, this runner has been defecating outside the house of resident Cathy Budde for the past seven weeks. Even worse—her children first spotted the woman.
Budde and her family have caught the runner at least three times. However, this has not stopped this mystery runner. She continues to leave waste behind at least once a week. The woman has gone so far as to change her running schedule to avoid prying eyes. The community has nicked named her “The Mad Pooper.”
If I had a nickel for every time I’ve considered stopping to poop on a stranger’s lawn during a run...
2. In a Game Packed with Mistakes, Ben McAdoo Shoulders Eli Manning with Much of the Blame (Sports Illustrated)
McAdoo did something surprising: He called out the 14-year veteran, two-time Super Bowl MVP quarterback. Perhaps publicly criticizing your most important player sends the strongest message to your team. Perhaps he thought Eli Manning needed that kick in the pants. Either way, the reality is that even in the heat of the moment after a loss, most head coaches, and certainly McAdoo included, choose their words carefully. And he chose to call out Manning for two of his mistakes—some of the many, many mistakes made by the Giants on Monday night—that altered the course of the game.
Giants fans very opinionated tonight pic.twitter.com/hZXlxmg0vJ— CBS Sports (@CBSSports) September 19, 2017
None of this is on Eli. He may well be a quarterback in decline, but after taking something like ten sacks in just two games, it’s impossible to consider his personal performance without putting it into context with the Giants’ larger concerns.
The Giants punted at left tackle, and here we are.
There might be some NFL quarterbacks who could still make it work with the current Giants’ O-Line, but I doubt that any of them are 36-year-old pocket passers.
3. A 40-year study of teens finds Generation Z avoids sex, alcohol, and driving at record rates (Business Insider)
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| So many classic movies could never get made today... |
By the early 2010s, the researchers wrote, 12th-graders were going out less often than eighth-graders did in the early 1990s and going on dates about as often as 10th-graders did in the early 1990s. Kids were also trying alcohol later and having sex far less often: About 54% of high-school students in 1991 reported having had sex, while only 41% did in the early 2010s.
"This isn't just about parenting," Twenge told Business Insider. "It's also about teens themselves, and the economy, and fertility rates, and people living longer."
There were some notes at the bottom of this article pointing out that today’s teens get together less but document their travels more, increasing feelings of loneliness and isolation for whomever gets left behind. Really, none of this strikes me as good, though, despite the fact that it’s tough to make a case in favor of teen pregnancy.
And yet… my own biological mother was a teen. She put me up for adoption, and it worked out okay all the way around. It certainly didn’t ruin my life, and I doubt very much that it ruined hers, either.
4. No One Will Want to Face These Yankees (FanGraphs)
You’re probably also aware that the Dodgers still hold the best record in baseball despite looking beyond terrible in September.
But did you know the Dodgers no longer hold the No. 2 run-differential spot in the sport? It’s true. That distinction now belongs to the Yankees, who entered play Monday having outscored the opposition by 62 runs (191 runs scored, 129 runs allowed) since August 14. And following last night’s victory over Minnesota, New York has now won 20 of their last 31 games.
Also:
No matter what else happens, I expect that this year’s ALCS to be a classic.
5. Army ‘beat up pretty good’ heading into Tulane (Times Herald-Record)
The circumstances have caused Army to move a few players from offense to defense in practice this week. Monken said junior safety Max Regan, who has seen limited action on defense but is one of Army’s better special teams players, would start for England if he can’t play.
“Jay (Bateman, Army’s defensive coordinator) brought it to my attention today,” Monken said. “If you look at our first game last year against Temple when we won on the road, and you look at our guys that we’ll travel to New Orleans with just a year and a few games later, it’s entirely different -- all the guys that have been injured or we lost to graduation or otherwise lost. It’s a different group of guys and we have to get them trained up and ready.”
The issues in Army’s secondary are dire. For the past few years, the team has been able to get away with some things because it was able to find some elite athletes at cornerback. This was true all the way back to maybe 2014. But I don’t know how much longer Army will be able to hold the back end of its defense together with a bunch of untried yearlings and plebes. That’s been the plan now for a good long while.
This was supposed to be a team with two legitimate lock-down corners in Brandon Jackson and Elijah Riley. Jackson’s loss was horrific, but somehow the team soldiered on. Meanwhile, Hyatt appears to be on the mend, but it’s unclear whether or not he’ll ever play football again, and honestly, he’s got bigger concerns. Sharp is out with an ACL. At this point, I have no idea who’ll start at the corners on Saturday.
Whatever’s going on with Elijah Riley, he needs to get it squared away ASAP.
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Bonus Round: The Punisher
No way to follow that, and I'm not even gonna try. Have a good weekend, everyone!
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