It feels like the world has gone off the rails. It wasn’t this week in particular or anything, but… wow.
Let’s get to it.
Marshawn Lynch is all about those androids, boss.
Yes, that was Lynch flashing on screen in HBO's trailer for Season 3 of the sci-fi series "Westworld," which premiered Thursday. In the trailer, the Seattle Seahawks running back walks behind actor Aaron Paul in a particularly dramatic scene about 54 seconds into the clip, sporting a T-shirt with the word "BORED" illuminated on it, along with the words "AMUSED," "ANGRY," "SAD" and "EXCITED."
I don’t watch Westworld, but I totally want to see this just to see if Lynch has any lines.
2. Donald Trump Has the Absolute Worst Taste in Movies (Daily Beast)
Whilst flying around in Trump’s tacky, gold-plated private jet, Singer recalled, “We hadn’t been airborne long when Trump decided to watch a movie. He’d brought along Michael, a recent release, but twenty minutes after popping it into the VCR he got bored and switched to an old favorite, a Jean Claude Van Damme slugfest called Bloodsport, which he pronounced ‘an incredible, fantastic movie.’”
Please, nobody tell this guy that *my* favorite movie is They Live, also from 1988 via director John Carpenter. Friends, it stars none other than Rowdy Roddy Piper in his most dramatic role and is famous for having arguably the best, i.e. most ridiculous, fight choreography of any movie of the era. This was the 80s, remember, so that’s really saying something.
3. How Do You Solve a Problem Like ‘Emma’? (NY Times)
There’s a moment toward the end of Jane Austen’s “Emma,” when the heroine goes to a picnic and is horrified to discover that she is not as wonderful as she once believed. Bored and careless of other people’s feelings, she makes a cutting remark that is meant to be witty but ends up humiliating its target, the kindly, twittery, tedious professional spinster Miss Bates. It’s one of those instances that turns everything around, for a story and for a character.
But how to get the tone right while filming it? How awful should Emma be before she learns not to be awful at all?
Despite the fact that I am a man, I actually really like Jane Austen. However, I couldn’t crack Emma, not least because it is long as all Hell. As an alternative, I recommend Love and Friendship based on the novella Lady Susan. Lady Susan is a much, much easier read, and if you like it, you can move on to Pride and Prejudice. Or just watch the movie.
“30 seconds of sunlight on your butthole is the equivalent of a full day of sunlight with your clothes on!”
Heh. Where would we be without Instagram?
I just looked through this guy’s whole account, and I have no idea if he’s actually serious, or if this is an elaborate prank played deadpan by a guy who is legitimately into yoga and fitness.
What a world.
According to an NFLPA memo released Thursday, here are some of the proposal's key terms that player reps and the union's executive council will weigh when they meet:
• The elimination of any game suspensions strictly for positive marijuana tests.
• A reduction in the number of players subjected to testing for marijuana.
• "Gambling definitions" that ensure players receive a portion of gambling revenue brought in by the league.
• Alterations to training camp, including the "introduction to a 5-day acclimation period," a limit of 16 days in pads and a limit of four joint practices in a three-preseason games scenario.
I don’t know if the new CBA is going to pass. I certainly understand why the Players wouldn’t necessarily want to add a 17th game. However, there are a couple of legit concessions here, not least of which appears to be profit-sharing on the League’s investment in fantasy football. That's potentially a lot of money. Also, though it seems idiotic to me, the concession on pot-smoking is something that I know a lot of the Players are passionate about getting.
6. The King Lear Era of Donald Trump’s Presidency (Slate)
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| Ian McKellen as King Lear on PBS. |
I included the first paragraph because it’s on-theme with this week’s artistic flavoring. For sheer snark, though, nothing tops the next one.
The American constitutional order is comprised of two camps in this moment: the president’s enemies and the president’s staffers. Having asserted this week that he is the “chief law enforcement officer of the United States,” and having previously concluded that the Constitution gives him “the right to do whatever I want,” the president has carved the world into the only two categories he comprehends: his interchangeable fixers and his mortal enemies. Attorney General Bill Barr, who auditioned for his position by offering himself up specifically as a fixer, has tried as valiantly as possible to get the president to stop tweeting about ongoing criminal matters. He even said he might quit if the president didn’t stop treating him like the president’s pool boy. Needless to say, he didn’t quit, and is, as a formal matter now, the president’s pool boy.
Needless to say, Slate also hates Bloomberg.
Which is frustrating because Sanders is currently polling a little over 30% in the Democratic primary with signs that he’s not going to be able to expand much beyond his base.
So. You figure, the President himself currently has an approval rating of ~42%, and when push comes to shove, at least another 5% of Americans are going to vote for the incumbent based purely on the strength of the current economy. That’s at a bare minimum. Which leaves something like 25% of the electorate up for grabs, and folks, no matter how mad you think most of America is about Trump’s King Lear-style insanity, that 25% of voters is in no way going to break for an honest-to-God avowed Socialist.
Remember: we’re talking about Pennsylvania here. I mean, I get that it was a long time ago, but have people seriously forgotten Michael Dukakis?
No, don’t answer that. I already know the truth.
Happy Saturday, folks.
Happy Saturday, folks.
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