Friday, April 12, 2013

Friday Mad Science: Scraping the Bottom of the Barrel

Happy Friday, everybody.
From issue #5 of G.I. Joe: A Real American Hero.
P. Diddy says he is not banging Kate Upton.  So I guess we can all breathe a sigh of relief?

Eh.  The Internet seemed shocked by this story--shocked, I tell you!--especially because of the age difference.  But I personally didn't care... until I saw the link on TMZ to their retrospective of Upton's Sexy Twitter feed.

As it happens, that is worth your time.

This pic came off of Upton's Twitter feed.  And I think I can
legally post it because she put it out in a public space.  I'm
pretty sure that's the raionale that TMZ and sites like that use
when they mine your feeds.  That said, you guys can feel
free to correct me, and if I'm wrong, I'll take this down.
This week's tech news comes from the Department of the Obvious: PC sales are down, and analysts are therefore freaking out about Microsoft's long-term prospects.

Oh no!  What is Microsoft going to do if people continue to favor tablets instead of desktops and laptops?

Seriously, though.  I love my Nexus 7; this was the first time I'd traveled with it, and the thing is ideal for corporate business trips and the like.  It's a perfect news/comic reader, and it'll play Netflix, and that alone ought to make it standard issue for the travel set.

However, you cannot actually work on the thing.  It's impossible.  There's no keyboard and because you can't effectively multi-task.  I'm typing this right now on my netbook.  And I'm not even pissed about  it!  It's just the right tool for the job.

So here's what I think, and I think that the good people at Microsoft are probably thinking this as well: yes, tablets may eat into their market share, especially among low-end users.  But sooner or later--and probably sooner--the tablet market is going to saturate, and people are going to want (or need) to get back to work, and Microsoft will still be there, offering the world's best business software suite.

Of course, all of that hinges on them actually offering the world's best business suite, and I'm not at all sure that Windows 8 is that, but still...  I don't know that it's Chicken Little time; it is, however, probably time for a strategic rethink of the business's direction.

So far this week we've looked at Lady Jaye, Scarlett, and the Baroness, and I'll be honest, that's pretty much all of the important ladies in the G.I. Joe universe.  So when I tell you that today's GI Joe Girl of the Day is Cover Girl, what I'm really telling you is that it took some effort to dig Cover Girl up out of the archives.

Cover Girl, as shown in IDW's GI Joe #7.
I remember Cover Girl only vaguely from the cartoons.  According to the Wiki, she was a successful fashion model who got bored living the high life in Manhattan and decided to enlist in the Army.  I'm sure that must've happened at least once.  Right?  So anyway, she then became the driver of the Joes' Wolverine Missile Tank--a fact that proves conclusively that no one at Hasbro knows anything whatsoever about tanks.

The Wolverine Missile Tank looks more like an artillery piece than
something you'd want in a direct-fire fight.
For the movie G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra, Cover Girl was played by Karolina Kurkova.  

This picture doesn't do Ms. Kurkova justice.
Try these, from IMDB.
Alas, it's a small part; she gets killed by Zartan about midway through the movie.

Slate's claiming that North Korea could probably make a nuclear-tipped missile.  But, Slate says, that's okay because they probably wouldn't know how to aim it.  

Which I guess means that the writers at Slate aren't familiar with the phrase, "Close only matters in horseshoes and hand grenades."  Personally, I can think of at least one other instance where "close" is probably good enough.

Slate also has a write-up on Obama's budget, which it calls "Class Warfare."  And again, I'm not sure that that terms means what they think it means.


This budget stuff is important, and I probably ought to read more about it--and read it more closely.  But it's just exhausting.  It's like listening to little kids bicker.  And at the end  of the day, I have my doubts that anything substantive is going to get passed, so...

That's all I've got.  My business trip is over at noon today, so God-willing, I may get home a little early today, depending on traffic.  Then tomorrow we've got Tri Practice, and then I've got Brian's Beachside Boogie on Sunday.  

The Boogie is always one of my favorite races of the year, and I'm looking forward to it big-time this time.  It'd be nice to race well.

Have a good weekend!

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